An Unforgettable Singapore Christmas

by Daniela Schreier

An Affair to Remember

Prologue:

"Goodbyes are only for those who love with their eyes. Because for those who love with heart and soul there is no such thing as separation.”

— Jalāl ad-Dīn Muhammad Rūmī

Witnessing my beloved Singapore* transform into a “Summer-Winter Wonderland” under the Holiday Cheers lights once again evokes a very distinct Christmas reminiscence from our shared journey—this writer’s and Singapura’s.

The day is December 24^th, 2024. It is time to travel. Travel back to a recent memory from the chronicles of An Affair to Remember which span more than three decades.          

In an attempt to make a long story short to accommodate the modern traveler, I ask for patience, as this pen’s narrative style is nostalgically shaped by the pre-app era. Thus, imagine merchants traveling the Silk Roads, enjoying a well-deserved rest, and sharing stories around the community kang in welcoming inns during long, cold winter nights. There is no rush to continue the journey.

Emphasis lies in cherishing the tale told and the fleeting moment. We desire for time to stand still, to treasure and prolong the moments spent with an old friend whose presence we do not dare to take for granted. And, in this spirit, the events and celebrations of this very special Christmas of 2024 mirror the essence of the bond between this writer and Singapura: ‘Sempre caro ❤️ nel pensiero’ — forever intertwined in our fondest memories, close at heart, whether near or far, in this world or the next.

The Invitation: 

"Winter must be cold for those with no warm memories.”

(Terry McKay,1957)

It was a beautiful late afternoon on Friday, 20^th December 2024, when I received a WhatsApp invite from one of my dearest friends. While deep friendship is often a product of many years in the making, this special bond developed but over the short course of two years. It’s living proof that friendship is not just a matter of time, but of progression in depth.

Her message read:

“Dear Daniela, if you don't have plans for the 24^th of December, please join us (intimate family members’ names followed by one count of man’s best friends) at Alkaff Mansion to celebrate.” 

As usual, I gave my longtime companion a side glance. He was still as elegant, handsome, and self-contained as he had been over thirty years ago when we first met at Changi Airport, and I nearly fell off the plane into his arms. As if he knew what I wanted to say, he said, "How lovely an invitation! How kind of them to think of us. Darling, you will enjoy Alkaff. I truly should have brought you there before. Yet after all, we've been back to Italy many times over the years."

I did not comprehend the Italy reference, but I mentally put it aside for one of our upcoming fireside chats. Over our years together, I had learned that things generally make sense down the road when the dots connect, so to speak. I had learned to be more patient, so I didn’t try to decipher each puzzle right away. We exchanged a familiar smile, confirming that neither an apology nor questions were necessary.

Instead, I found myself on my phone responding: “Dear Friend, so touched and happy to join you and your family. Thank you.”

Her response found me immediately: “Fantastic! Meet at 7 pm. At the Café’. Casual Dress. No Presents Please.”

Stairs leading to Alkaff Mansion

Approaching Alkaff Mansion

Alkaff Mansion

Approaching The Venue — Alkaff Mansion:

“What is it about this place? There is something about it that makes you

want to whisper. It’s so peaceful here. It’s like another world.”

(Terry McKay, 1957)

“Well, it is. It’s my grandmother’s world.”

(Nickie Ferrante, 1957)

As I sat in the car on the way to Telok Blangah Hill, where Alkaff Mansion is located, I understood why my companion had mentioned Italy in relation to the venue a few days earlier. I wondered if Singapore would ever stop to surprise me. "Hmm, c'è un po' d'Italia in te —there is a bit of Italy in you,” I thought, smiling at him. As we drove up the winding road in the hilly area to Alkaff Mansion, memories and the world intertwined and came to life in front of me.

My beloved Singapore's beautiful angsana, yellow rain, yellow flame, and rubber trees lined roads transformed into the familiar pine, cypress, evergreen oak, and olive trees of Tuscany. I thought of the orange and lemon trees in the city squares of Marina di Massa. I remembered the chestnut, oak, and beech trees that adorn the roadsides of Passo del Vestito. This scenic alpine pass connects Massa and Castelnuovo Garfagnana, leading into the Apuan Alps. The mountains offer spectacular views of marble quarries and the Mediterranean Sea and afford relief from hot summer days.

As we approached Alkaff, my companion — the all-too-familiar stranger — glanced at me, and I sensed it. Slowly returning his gaze, I laughed and said, "Yes, darling. It's still a yes. I would make the same choice all over again." He gently touched my shoulder. "Was I not right? Alkaff Mansion reminds you of Tuscany. Your excursions with Alfa — he referred to my Italian grandmother — in the Apuan Alps during the long summer months and in the surrounding hilly areas near Florence at other times of the year.” My answer was, “Yes, you know me well.”

Ci Siamo Arriviti—Upon Arrival:  

“Oh, you have the most beautiful place here.” (Terry McKay, 1957)

“Thank you.” (Grandmother Janou, 1957)

“I think I could stay here forever.”

(Terry McKay, 1957)

Alkaff Mansion’s European charm and architecture, including its fountains and outdoor spaces, were not lost on me and reminded me of Italy and the South of France. In particular, the mansion brought back fond memories of an excursion with my grandmother Alfa Ferri-Morganti to a Tuscan estate owned by her lifelong friend. There, I felt an instant sense of belonging and timeless safety. Frankly, I wanted to stay forever. However, much like in the movie, the wise and experienced gentilissime signore around me advised me to seize the opportunity and make my luck in the world and return later in life to cherish my memories at this sanctuary.

Alkaff Mansion was once home to a single Singaporean family. Initially converted from private estate into a renowned Italian restaurant, it is now a multi-concept lifestyle and dining venue. My gentle companion, who had recounted the mansion’s history while we were in the car, made sure we arrived a bit early. His ongoing thoughtfulness, care, and consistency made it easy to dedicate myself to him and desire to stay close by his side.

 He now took me gently by the hand, and together, we explored the intrinsically familiar beauty of Alkaff Mansion. An open window caught my attention. I pointed and said, “guarda, ciccio, la finestra aperta!” It was such a simple thing. Yet it made me feel as though I were back in Italy. I had been anticipating crowds. However, as we walked around to discover the Café, we found that the veranda area was empty. It was ideal. I smiled at him and he just laughed as he sensed my relief.

La Famiglia – The Family:

“And all I could say was, ‘hello.’”

(Terry McKay, 1957)

And there he was. The host’s new son-in-law appeared. We exchanged hellos. He had come from work, where he had been getting his office “holiday-ready,” and he had arrived separately from the family. As usual, my beloved companion took a backseat, allowing the conversation to flow freely.

Within minutes, the rest of the party arrived. We exchanged hugs and were seated informally on the veranda. It was an intimate gathering of just six adults and one canine friend, Charles. The host, an octogenarian Singaporean "gentleman extraordinaire" and world citizen, gave a warm toast to family and the holidays. He was known for his wit, diplomacy, exceeding kindness, and his unique ability to make anybody feel like a million bucks. Indeed, he included and welcomed people into his life, fostering sincere and meaningful relationships with them.

Meet the Dream Team:

 “If you can paint, I can walk.”

(Terry McKay, 1957)

As we ordered plates to share, I was grateful to be seated next to my friend’s husband, the host and gentleman extraordinaire. Over the past two years, they had opened their door and invited a stranger inside, and today we celebrated Christmas. My friend is an accomplished international relations expert and the wife of the suave host. She continues to inspire me. I often talk to my confidant about their love and dedication to each other. For more than three decades, they have referred to each other as “The Dream Team.” They raised a daughter, traveled the world, and created rich and meaningful relationships while making a positive professional impact on the world. They are a true inspiration on so many levels.

When I see couples struggling in therapy, I often think of my friends' well-thought-out marital framework. As the evening progressed, we made new memories, exchanged old ones, and discussed the plans of the young couple—the host’s daughter and son-in-law—at the table. Despite the small number of attendees and the intimate setting, it felt as if everything significant in this world was present. There was a pair of lives that had just embarked on their shared expedition, as well as a flawlessly prepared dream team that persisted in journeying through life and engaging in active, vocational, and individual endeavors. The rest of the party had passed the halfway point of their middle years and were entering the transitional phase to mature adulthood, reevaluating life and its meaning. And, of course, there was Charles, who had the wisdom of a dog who knew about the world.

A small, diverse group representing different ethnicities, religions, and age groups gathered for a Singapore Christmas at a Mediterranean-style mansion. They simply enjoyed spending time together. There was no grand dinner. There was no fancy dress. There were no big speeches. Not that there is anything wrong with that. But that evening, it was simply heart-to-heart. It was person-to-person. Before leaving, my friend and I briefly explored the upstairs of Alkaff Mansion. When we returned, her suave husband greeted her with a grand smile and sparkle in his eyes, just as he was famous for.

It was an unforgettable Singapore Christmas. As we parted ways, we all hoped for another chance to connect. On January 2^nd, 2025, our prayers were answered when we celebrated the new year at the suave gentleman’s home. We shared kopi and pastries during our quiet afternoon visit. It was a debut of sorts because the “gentleman extraordinaire” loved dogs, and they loved him. He also enjoyed meeting Dr. Max for the first time that day. Dr. Max is our Maltese canine family member. Max immediately took to the suave gentleman and sat with him throughout our entire visit. It was so sincere and touching.

Looking at my quiet companion, I thought, "Duas and prayers are answered — here we are again with our dear friends in Singapore, the home of my heart. We are surrounded by family who, not so long ago, were complete strangers."

We parted ways, full of gratitude. Our hearts were filled with affection as we had made one more unforgettable memory. It was a memory for the annals of friendship and a special entry in the personal collection of An Affair to Remember between Singapura and this writer.

In February, our dear friends celebrated their 35th wedding anniversary at an intimate getaway.

Impending Loss:

“Each of your breaths is a priceless jewel, since each of them is irreplaceable

and once gone, can never be retrieved.”

—Imam-al-Ghazali

In March 2025, I received news that I never wished to receive: the suave gentleman had been hospitalized. Destiny had been decreed. His spirit and wits had no power to change what was coming. Nor did his profound kindness and zest for life.

Goodbyes:

 "Inna Lillahi wa inna ilayhi raji'un."  "Verily, to God we belong, and to Him we shall return."

—The Qur’an (2:156)

We met one last time at the hospital before the gentleman extraordinaire embarked on his final journey home. In May of 2025, my friend’s refined husband departed from this world in the presence of his beloved family.

The world became poorer that day. His sparkling eyes, his kindness that touched every heart he encountered, and the wit and sincerity of the storyteller who lit up our lives were no longer.

I remember him saying at least once during each meeting, "I am a lucky man." This encompassed his upbringing, his career, his social circle, and most significantly, his close family and matrimony. His genuine gratitude for life will always be etched in my memory.

“Thank you for the light you shone, the paths you brightened, and the memories you left behind.” 

Memento Mori

True Gifts are Not On Sale: Treasure the Moment “Janou, I have a gift for you.” (Nickie Ferrante to Janou, his grandmother, 1957)

 “I am too old for gifts.”  (Janou to Nickie Ferrante, 1957).

“No one is too old for gifts.”

(Nickie Ferrante to Janou, 1957).

He gives her a painting of his deceased grandfather that he painted himself.

“Oh, Nickie, how did you do it?”

(Janou to Nickie Ferrante, 1957)

" I did it From Memory!”

( Nicki Ferrante, 1957)

“It’s Andre my late husband. It’s so real. So, like him.”

(Janou, 1957 to Terry)

In my heart, last Christmas will forever be remembered as an unforgettable Singapore Christmas. It serves as a reminder that the most meaningful gifts come from the heart. Gifts such as time, friendship, shared experiences, and helping others are invaluable. Each moment is irreplaceable. Memories require time and presence to create, and they can provide comfort during challenging times as well as joy during happy reminiscing. Give the gift of love, time, togetherness, and kindness this holiday season. Keep the spirit of our suave host alive!

Just as he had welcomed us one day with sparkling eyes, he left us with sparkling memories and tales to share. Life is full of gains and losses. We must embrace both and be grateful for life's gifts.

For now, dear traveller, let’s turn the page and close the book. There are more stories awaiting to be told in the memoirs of an Affair to Remember between this writer and Singapura, which will be chronicled in due course. Return as you wish. You are welcome here.

And finally, here's to you, my dearest darling Singapore—Happy holidays! Merry Christmas!  I can’t believe how quickly time has passed; how quickly the years have flown by.  You know what I wish for you?  May you receive one gift only: the gift of shared time wrapped in love, loyalty, and dedication.  Make each moment count. … With Love Always,

Reference

McCarey, L. & Wald, J. (Directors). (1957). An affair to remember [Film]. 20th Century Fox.

Footnotes 

* Florence/Florentine - personified as he for the literary purposes of this article.

** Singapore / Singapura - personified as he for the literary purposes of this article.

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Daniela, also known as Dr. D, is an U.S. board-certified clinical psychologist. She is the clinical director of the boutique psychology firms Ihsan Living Pte Ltd in Singapore and Smart Living LLC in Chicago, USA. A polyglot and former business and PR consultant, Daniela first came to Singapore three decades ago and considers herself Singaporean at heart. For many years she worked as an associate professor of psychology in the USA, authored two books, copious articles and contributed extensively to several well-known international TV and radio stations on air.

Named after the classic 1957 American film An Affair to Remember, this column chronicles the lifelong poignant love story of Daniela Schreier, a German-born, American-educated, and Singaporean-at-heart woman, with the Garden City. . The second serve, titled “An Unforgettable Singapore Christmas,” reminds the reader that the greatest gifts are never on sale. They come from the heart. Gifts such as time, friendship, shared experiences, and helping others are invaluable. Each moment is irreplaceable. Memories require time and presence to create. They can provide comfort during challenging times as well as joy during happy reminiscing. Give the gift of love, time, and kindness this holiday season. And Memento Mori—remember that you have to die.